佛周记：我能为这个世界做什么？

2015年10月22日 星期四    晴

   今天我不知为什么？似乎明白了这么多天，这么多年所发生的一切都源自于自己的空虚。就像谈超说我的，“道理你都明白，你就是做不到。”为什么做不到？我的人生过去这么几年来，就一点成功没有？当然是有，只不过弊大于利。回忆过去，我不断地在努力，跌倒再爬起，再跌倒再爬起。从2007年一边上班一边自修本科开始，认识了很多人，也得到一张认可的文凭。之后相继参加会计培训、网络工程师培训和考试以及职称评定。到2012年，我遭受到感情的打击后，自愿加入中国佛教协会，成为一名皈依居士。后一并加入中国天主教协会，成为当时参与教会和佛教活动最积极的教徒成员。在此期间接受大量佛教和天主教理论知识。直到2013年在佛陀的指引下，我遇见了英孚这个英语平台，并加入口语学习。认识了一帮值得信赖的朋友。我为什么说这些，我也不知道。只是感觉今天的我没有失去也没得到什么。但总结这几年这些日子的经历，其实就是一段简单的故事，可在这故事中，有好事和坏事，有好人也有坏人，有是是非非，也有非非是是。而我却重复上演那六个字：“上、下、轻、重、缓、急”，再减少就是四个字“恬淡虚无”。其实人生就是不断地在重复犯错误，重复演着那无聊的是是非非，突然我想起一句话：有志者事竟成，破釜沉舟，百二秦关终属楚。苦心人天不负，卧薪尝胆，三千越甲可吞吴。这就是我的人生，我的中国梦。

  I graduated from college with a background in information technology. I had been looking for jobs when my father suggested that I volunteer at a political organization. What a fantastic experience! If only I had done that sooner, I would have realized that volunteering is a great way to  meet people. Soon afterward, I had interviews at Xin hua shao cheng community health  center whose employees. Following the interviews, I was offered a job. I am always determined to work in the real hospital. I gladly took the job and have remained passionate about my work ever since, although, frankly, things were difficult in the years after the bubble burst. For the last nine years, I have been studing English at EF center in Chengdu. As soon as the market picks up enough, I hope to open my own development. Yesterday, TJ told a question to me , what is your Chinese dream? Actually my Chinese dream that is i can get enough money from my work. After, i will get married with a girl who likes me. And then, i will building own family . i will have a children. I will buy a big apartment in countryside. I can enjoy fun and happy with my family on holiday. In Chinese new year, we can go  back my parents's home to have dinner together.  I think so, this is my Chinese dream.